Greetings from Spockgirl Musings, where logic rules, but the frailties of
human nature, genetic inadequacies and hormonal imbalances wreak havoc.

Friday, January 14, 2011

Retreat...


I've never been one to stay in bed, except for the necessity of sleep, which over the years often did not come easy. Even when I was sick as a dog, I had to get up and go to work, or get up and do something instead of lying in bed feeling like crap. I've never really been a morning person either, but not in the tradtional sense. It was mostly because I didn't get much sleep. I wasn't grumpy or lethargic and I never needed a cup of coffee or food just to get me going. I recall on one of my two vacations that I took in over twenty years (yeah... two vacations in twenty-two years), I would wake up at 6AM without an alarm... just to go stroll on the beach alone... no other footprints... no one else around.  Of course my travelling buddy would keep on sleeping, but that was fine.

Then upheaval. Three years ago. Change. It was involuntary change, but much needed.  Change followed by two years of relative peace and calm... literally. Then change approaching again.... so soon? Unwilling change, unwanting of change. Ill prepared for change...  Did I mention change? This morning I started to write... actually write what I was feeling at the very moment,  but I can't share it.  All I could think of was "Retreat!".  To be cozy and floopy in a warm, comfy bed, because outside it feels too damn cold.

5 comments:

thormoo said...

Yep, that sounds familiar. I know that you are familiar with my posts now, which are pretty open, straight forward and...personal.
It wasn't always that way. When I first started to write like I do now, I would write it all out, then edit the crap out of if to the point where I wasn't really sharing much online. But you know what? It didn't matter because I had gotten it all out of me in the rough draft and that was what counted. I sure hope you find what what you need, Spockgirl and what your looking for...Peace!

Spockgirl said...

Thormoo:
Peace is highly over-rated. Peace is what got me to where I am right now. I let it stay with me too long. Peace and its partner in crime... patience. What I need is to find a new job in this prospectless place. The trade-off for living in this area surrounded by nature's beauty, is that it is damn near impossible to earn a living or even make ends meet.

Spockgirl said...

Thormoo:
That wasn't meant to be harsh. Just blunter than usual.

thormoo said...

Just a point of clarity..I just re-read my psodt and at the end I mention that I hope you find what you are looking for. That should've have been period, the peace reference was my sign of, in stead of good by I say peace. What am I saying? I wasn't suggesting at all that what you were looking for is peace and sorry it read that way. I actually haven't the foggiest idea what your looking for and it doesn't matter. Still, I hope you find it! That's better I think..I hope that clears that up.

Spockgirl said...

T:
Thanks for clarification. You just made me laugh. I'm going to have to stop writing spontaneous comments to things people write. Heh... NORMALLY, I would have seen the EXCLAMATION mark after the word "Peace" ! and known what you meant, but nope, not today.
No harm, no foul.