Greetings from Spockgirl Musings, where logic rules, but the frailties of
human nature, genetic inadequacies and hormonal imbalances wreak havoc.

Monday, February 20, 2012

Death and serendipity


Death is a part of life. I have known this since I was a kid. I don't think I ever really wondered whether or not there was a heaven or a hell, but I somehow knew what they were purported to be. All I knew is that someone was gone... they died... they ceased to exist on this Earth. Nothing else really mattered. I didn't need a sugar-coating. I am not sure, but the first death I remember was from when I was in Grade 4 I think, when I was nine or ten years old. Considering that I don't have that many memories from my childhood, it is interesting that this one remained. I went on a short road-trip shopping with a friend and her mom and on the way home, on the highway, we saw a car accident on the other side. Sometime after that, I'm not sure when, we found out that it was a friend from school, her brother and mom and dad who had died in that accident. I don't remember anything else. I remember a few years later, at a birthday party sleepover over at a friend's house, we were in the basement playing with the Ouija board, and after the silly teenage girl questions, something strange happened and the board spelled out the name of the girl who had died as being in the room with us. We all immediately said that it had to be one of the girls pushing the pointer to the letters, but it was still enough to freak us all out. Just one of those weird things that I do happen to remember. Oh... the Ouija board bit resurfaced because... the other day I had a disturbing dream involving one.

Anyways... moving along... I have often wondered if death didn't have the same impact on me because I wasn't capable of love, but then my mom and my cat sort of proved that theory wrong I suppose. However, death is still just death, in the end. But... can anything about death be serendipitous? I say... yes. Can death be a proponent for making unexpected and perhaps even fortunate discoveries? Certainly. The death of an Irishman in 1876 is one of the things that initiated me into this internet journey I started almost two years ago. Oddly enough, death and blogging have made me discover things about myself that would otherwise have remained hidden. I have written a little bit about love letters, war letters, letters in general and my fondness for words, plain and simple, but where does death and serendipity come into this? Well... in getting back into the routine of reading some of the blogs in my favourites list today, I found this. It kind of makes me wonder if my fondness stems from people expressing things that I can't express myself... or things that I am incapable of feeling.

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