Greetings from Spockgirl Musings, where logic rules, but the frailties of
human nature, genetic inadequacies and hormonal imbalances wreak havoc.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Becoming...


 I don’t think I like being this... human. Feelings and emotions seem such useless, counter-productive things. They serve no purpose whatsoever other than to assist one in feeling a connection with other humans. If that is indeed their primary function, then perhaps I would be better off not having them. If I have not within me the capacity for love nor hate, nor to feel anger, then what is left to feel? Just sorrow and grief?

I spent most of my life not having a want or need for acceptance or approval by any other human being. Why would I care now? Becoming... human? A little late. Is it even worth it?


Background: This "Elf on a Shelf" isn't really my type of thing for Christmas ornamentation, however, I bought it at an antique shop several years ago because it reminded me of one of the tiny felt Christmas Tree decorations we had as kids. It's one of those sort of "creepy" things that now seem cute. The weirdest thing is that I don't believe I ever named any dolls or toys I had as a kid, but for some reason, this thing seemed like a "Danny". Every once in a while he would fall off the dresser and do face plants on the hallway floor. Didn't seem right seeing him on the floor and just saying "hey not again". Yeah, weird, I know.

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