Lost...

I don't know how many times in life I have whispered the words "I am lost", not fully grasping their depth until this year.  Even though now, there are no grand difficulties thrust upon me (but perhaps one) nor obstacles in my path, there is just... the unknown. All I can think of to say about the unknown is this: It is easier to prepare for something than it is to prepare for nothing.

Oddly enough, I  have come to realize that the words "my path" have never really come up before this year either. But, I must ask... what good is a path without purpose? To put one foot in front of the other to make your way down a road to some unknown destination? I find that hard to accept... and at this point I am finding it more difficult to even find a road on which to take the first step. However, that being said, to have been one thing, in one place, for so many years, to have put one foot in front of the other, but ultimately staying in one position, was that easier to accept? For some reason, yes, it was. I had a job to do, I had tasks to complete, I had deadlines, I had structure, I had a purpose, and that was... sufficient.  When that came to a rather abrupt end, I somehow found a sense of peace and quiet reflection, but now... more often than I should, I find myself...  truly lost.